Dance Fever (Eren kicks ass)
by fluffykitty12
Summary: Eren has a talent nobody knows. He can dance- loves to dance. But he's a soldier, and soldiers don't dance. Levi finds out, though, and when the squad ends up in a pub in the midst of a dance off, Eren competes. The dance-off turns into a strip tease, Erwin gets called to the capital, and the scout regiment learns some new moves. Oh yeah- Armin is a bro, and Erwin is confused.
1. Sneaking Out

**Eren is such a beautiful character. He's impulsive, dangerous, and frightened all in one- and he's also still just a 15 year old kid. 15year olds do stupid things, and this fic is centered around Eren's hidden ability- he can dance. call it crack fic or whatever the hell you want, but this needs to be writeen, goshdangit!**

* * *

It started out simple, as things always seemed to do with Jager. Levi had been working late into the night finishing some paper work before deciding to head down to the dungeon, make sure their resident titan shifter was okay, since he was, after all, responsible for the boy, and head to bed for a well-deserved rest.

They'd stopped posting guards in the basement, and they basically just allowed Eren to cuff himself up at night. They'd thought they could trust the boy. Thought being the key word.

Levi was incredibly concerned to see his cell empty, bed unmade. He stepped inside uncertainly, eyes scanning all the dark corners cautiously, before he placed a hand on the boy's messy sheets. They were cold- as was his pillow. He hadn't been here in hours.

He didn't panic outright. Was he concerned? Yes. But knowing eren- impulsive, shitty brat that he was, he knew the boy was most likely walking around or doing something incredibly unreasonable to do at night.

Still- he couldn't help but feel a bit apprehensive at the thought of the boy alone somewhere, where he could easily be hurt. He hurried outside, first checking the training grounds but finding them deserted. The same was true for the stables.

He was getting a little anxious now- what if Eren had run off or done something equally dangerous and stupid? Levi seemed to be the only one outside tonight, every place was deserted, the soldiers all sleeping...

He saw a dim light in the distance and blanched. It was the lecture hall- which should've been closed. He never thou ght he'd see Eren inside the classroom any longer than the boy had to be, but he jogged towards the hall, staying stealthy, uncertain as to what exactly was going on.

He ducked inside the entryway- Eren had the lights on as dimly as possibly and was standing in the deserted lecture all, alone. Levi stood just outside the doorway to the hall, back pressed against the wall, listening to everything going on through the doorway and peering in.

"I'm a soldier." Eren muttered. The boy's fists were clenched at his side, back to the door, as though he were facing some sort of internal struggle. "Dammit, I'm a soldier!"

Levi placed a hand on the hilt of his blades for a moment, wondering if the boy was bout to go titan on him.

Eren looked up at the ceiling, running a hand through his hair, frustrated. "I'm a soldier." he said, voice barely above a whisper, voice sounding close to breaking. "But- I'm so different. They never do this- if they knew about me, about what I do- shame me, laugh at me. Think I was an idiot."

Eren stared at the ground, as though contemplating his failure. Levi was growing seriously concerned- what was it the boy was keeping hidden from him?

"I'm a soldier. But dammit- I gotta dance!" Eren jumped onto the topmost table that served as desks for the row farthest back, hitting the play button on the boom box.

The boy struck a pose, face dead serious- one foot in front of the other, toe pointed, hand in the air, wrist angled downward daintily like he was some sort of fabulous creature...

 _Wake up in the mornin' feelin' like P-Diddy  
Grab my glasses I'm out the door I'm gonna hit the city  
Before I leave brush ma teeth with a bottle of Jack  
'Cause when I leave for the night I ain't comin' back_

Levi's eyes widened as Jager strutted down the desks like it was a catwalk, one pointed foot landing daintily in front of the other, one hand placed on his hips.

As the song went into the next verse the boy froze, arms out as he stood daintily on tip-toes, exercising perfect muscle control before shuffling backwards to the beat, his ass bouncing up and down as he arched his back perfectly to accentuate it, one arm swinging to make the dance move blend with the beat.

The song blended into the next verse, and Eren went into some sort of hand-choreography, arm movements calculated and captivating. He moved both his forearms in unison to one side, then the next, like they were windshield wipers, rocking his hips sensually as he did so. It took the breath out of Levi.

 _Don't stop, make it pop  
DJ, blow my speakers up_

Eren lost all semblance of self-control, then, leaping gracefully down onto the table below him, feet coming up into a near-perfect split mid-air. He landed immacultely, like some sort of cat, his face painted with concentration and passion as the music took full hold of his body- he spun once, a perfect rotation, purposefully falling forward onto his stomach, doing the worm backwards until he reached the other side of the table on the opposite side of the room, leaping to his feet and leaning forward so his back was arched, doing some sort of jazz-hands to the front while his ass seemed to move on it's own accord...

He was a maniac, then, prancing forward and bringing his knees up like a marching band player would, arm swinging opposite his leg as his feet kept perfect time to the beat.

 _Tonight, Imma fight  
'Til we see the sunlight  
TiK ToK, on the clock  
But the party don't stop no  
Whoa-oh oh oh  
Whoa-oh oh oh_

He leaped again, in a display of grace, before landing on the third row of desks down, his brown locks flipping as he threw his head to the one side, crossing his legs daintily and striking that damn pose with his arm up...

He threw his head back, hair flopping to reveal the boy panting heavily, sweaty green shirt clinging to his body, but a smile on his face. Pure, unadulterated happiness filled the kid's expression, before he frowned.

"My squad- they can never see his side of me. They'd lose all respect for me- just because I love to move..." he let out a breath, closing his eyes and looking pained. "Just- just keep in in, Eren. Nobody has to know. Except Armin, but he understands..."

Eren stopped talking to himself, then, noticing the clock on the wall. It was nearly one in the morning, and his eyes widened.

"Shitshitshit, I gotta go..." he grabbed him boom box, running outside. In his haste, he didn't notice Levi tucked into the dark corner of the room.

Levi watched him go, a mix of emotions inside himself. Eren was an amazing dancer- the boy had incredible skill. but even then- the boy was sneaking out to dance. The officer in him knew Eren was breaking the rules, not putting himself into his cell like he was supposed to. But the Lvi part- the part that cared for his soldier's well-being, despite his normally bored exterior- kept thinking of the passion behind the boy's moves, the happiness on his face.

He couldn't see anything harmful out of the boy dancing. In fact, it might even be good for him, help him express himself. So he resolved to let the boy dance- he'd follow and hide himself, keep watch over the boy from the shadows- and he'd keep quiet about it. Eren was thought of as Humanity's hope- in reality, he was just a 15 year old, scared of powers he knew he couldn't control. Levi couldn't bring himself to punish the boy for dancing- especially when it seemed like such a release for the kid.

When he checked on Eren fifteen minutes later, the boy pretended to be asleep. As long as these late nights didn't affect his performance in training, Levi would let it slide. And that night, routine was set for Levi- at least once a night, he got to see Eren- the youngest member of his squad with the heaviest burden on his shoulders- happy.

* * *

 **Well? What do you guys think? I hope the descriptions of the dancing were clear enough to paint a good picture, I jsut think Eren needs a way to be free- and yes, people will find out about his ability in future chapters. Please review! :)**


	2. Dance Off or Strip Tease?

**Please review! :)**

It was a relatively boring mission to the capital, to say the least. Erwin had wanted him to accompany some documents the bureaucrats thought were especially important- not because they were, of course, but because the fat delegates thought they were, and somehow having humanity's greatest soldier along with them would make them that much safer.

Of course, if Levi was going, Eren needed to come, as well, which led to the rest of his squad coming for support, not to mention the newest recruits- some of them Eren's old friends.

The mission had been uneventful, to say the least, and the evening after they'd delivered the documents they found themselves at a crowded bar downtown- the older squad members such as Ulouo and Eld intent on getting wasted to forget the nightmare fuel they'd seen- hell, even some of the younger kids were going at it- after the siege on Trost, everybody had seen something they needed to forget.

Levi simply nursed a glass of scotch, pouring himself more from the bottle as needed. He didn't feel compelled to get wasted- he was more focused on making sure none of the shady looking bar-goers tried to approach Petra.

And beside him sat a stone-cold sober Eren Jager, dressed in his brown leather jacket with the green shirt underneath, as well as his usual white slacks. The boy only lacked his harness, as they hadn't been needing ODM gear. He looked around at the activity nearby with interest, green eyes bright, scanning every surface, everything, looking for new experiences. It seemed like Eren had never lost that wonder when he saw new things.

"Can I have a beer?" He asked, looking over at his superior hopefully.

Levi couldn't help but feel bad as he put down his scotch, shaking his head. "No. I'm sorry, but we don't know if it'll trigger transformation. Maybe later, after Hanji's run some tests..."

"Alright." Eren looked disappointed, but he didn't press the issue, not wanting to ruin everyone's good time by upsetting the Captain.

"Alright, everyone, it's Friday Night! You know what that means!" the barkeeper shouted, jumping atop the bar.

"Dance off!" the crowd grinned and several people stepped forward. Levi watched, disinterested, sitting back and taking his scotch with him so nobody atop the bar would knock it down.

The dance-off largely consisted of watching people drunk off their asses falling down. One incredibly large woman nearly crushed a fellow, and Levi had to bite back the laughter that bubbled in his throat.

He looked over to see Eren watching the dancers with a critical eye, though. The boy sat straight, face dead serious, as he watched every move and swallowed. He could beat any one of these people, if only...

And then there was a sober man on the bar, grinning as the music played. He did some sort of jig, incredibly complex and well-done- the ladies all cheered as the well-chiseled hero danced, and the man finally jumped down, grinning.

"You like that, you fucking pigs!?" he bellowed over the music, laughing at the soldiers. "free entertainment to be had along with your drinks- your pay comes from our pockets!"

Levi ignored the man, simply sipping his drink casually, and the man turned back to the crowd of bar patrons surrounding him. Still, several of his comrades had started scowling at the man, and Jean strode over, looking serious. "I can beat him, sir. When I was young I took tap-lessons..."

I seemed as though the entire group of soldiers had congregated around Levi, anxious to see what the man would do to defend their honor. Levi took a sip of scotch, swishing what was left of the amber liquid in his glass...

"Jager. Get up there."

"Me, sir!?" Eren looked both shocked and alarmed his Captain had picked him. He wasn't even sure he could do it...

Eren had paled considerably, and his hands had begun to shake. Levi noticed it and handed the boy his glass. "Drink. It'll calm your nerves. Then get up there and kick his ass."

"But Sir-"

"That's a order, Eren." Levi's tone left no room for argument.

"You can do it, Eren." Armin, who was in civilian clothes, looked over at his friend seriously. "I know you can. Here- take my fedora. It'll add a little flair." the petit blonde removed his brown fedora, placing it on his comrades head. Everyone stared at Eren seriously, and the boy realized this was really happening.

"Okay- okay, I can do this..."

"Of course you can. Now go." Levi said simply. Eren nodded, his features hardening. his face got tht determind scowl on it as he shot back the last of the whiskey. He didn't even entertain the possibility of the alchol causing him to transform, he was so set on his goal...

"Let's fucking do this!" Eren jumped up on the bar, adjusting the Fedora so it was tilted at a rash angle. He strode over to the far side of the bar, flashing the man who'd insulted them all a shaky grin as he settled onto the edge of the bar, arms at his sides, dead serious. He took a breath.

"Armin- gimme a beat!" he yelled.

Armin, who'd manage to take over for the usual DJ, put something on the turn table.

Eren staid simple- back against the wall, arms crossed over his chest, his knee bent and the toe of one foot resting against the wall behind him. He flashed that stupid grin he had- somehow the fedora made it even more stunning.

 _I can move mountains_  
 _I can work a miracle, work a miracle_  
 _Oh, oh, I keep you like an oath_  
 _May nothing but death do us part_

He started by strutting to the middle of the bar, slow and controlled despite the music. As the music started, he slowly peeled off his brown leather jacket and tossed it into the crowd. Mikasa caught it and held it, but the move drove some girls wild as he brought his arms up, twisting his core slightly to the beat, hands moving along with it. As it went into the steel guitar solo he kicked up his leg, grabbing it in mid-air. Hs toes nearly touched his forehead, and the bar errupted into cheers at the shocking display of flexibility. Eren simply grinned beneath the brim of the fedora, body jackknifing into entirely new but beautiful choreograpgy as the chorus started.

 _She wants to dance like Uma Thurman  
Bury me till I confess  
She wants to dance like Uma Thurman  
And I can't get you out of my head_

His hand had found it's way onto his hip, now, his other hand swinging back and forth perfectly in time to the beat. He started to strut again, before dropping to his knees abruptly.

 _The stench, the stench, of summer sex_

 _and CK eternity oh hell yes_

He bit his lower lip like some sort of shy girl, hands reaching down coyly to the hem of his shirt, teeth finding purchase in the collar, before that was off too, thrown into the frenzied crowd.

 _Divide me down to the smallest i can be_

 _put your, put your v-v-v-enom in me!_

He was on his feet them for the chorus, hands above his head, one foo pumping to the beat as his hips twirled incredibly...

 _She wants to dance like Uma Thurman  
Bury me till I confess  
She wants to dance like Uma Thurman  
And I can't get you out of my head_

Levi nearly dropped his glass when he took a look at Jeager's abs. The his boy was damp with sweat, highlighting the six pack all the more, and if anything, the boy's treasure trail disappearing into the waistband of his pants.

The bar was filled with screamed patrons and men staring in awe, now, some shamelessly.

The boy slowly slid downwards on the bar until he was in a full split, staring down the man who'd called the soldier pigs and flashing that shit-eating grin he had.

 _You'll find your way  
And may death find you alive  
Take me down the line  
In Gem City we turn the tide  
You'll find your way  
And may death find you alive  
Take me down the line  
In Gem City we turn the tide_

The boy took full advantage off the slower part of the song, leaping onto the air, landing on a nearby table with the grace of some sort of cat. Wolf-whistles and catcalls were sounding, the boy did a perfect pirouette, before falling gracefully to his knees, flipping back his hair to reveal that face, pull of passion, his own hands caressing his chiseled chest as some of the more shameless women did the same.

 _She wants to dance like Uma Thurman  
Bury me till I confess  
She wants to dance like Uma Thurman  
And I can't get you out of my head_

He was back on the bar, then, bent nearly double, forearms resting on his thighs as his hips gyrated in that inhumanly attractive way they had. His hands fell into some sort of rhythm in the air, picking up imaginary things and putting them down, weaving a story so complex no one could read it- it was incredible.

He was back on his feet, sashaying once, feet somehow weaving between the base as the final verse came on.

 _I can move mountains_  
 _I can work a miracle, work a miracle_  
 _Oh, oh, I keep you like an oath_  
 _May nothing but death do us part_

His fingers wove through his chocolate brown hair, elbows up, hips twirling in perfect time with the base.

He grinned as the song hit the last word, dropping to his knees, arms out, chest fluttering like a birds with exhaustion. Sometime during the routine, the boy's fedora had fallen off, and his the top button on his pants had come undone...

The bar was in an absolutely silent for a moment, before a gruff looking man in a corner booth spoke. "Godammit. I'm straight." he growled.

"So's spaghetti, until it gets hot." Armin said matter-of-factly. And the bar errupted into cheers- some people swarmed around Eren, trying to shove dollar bills into his waistband, but Levi took that as his cue to stand in front of him, and Jean and Mikasa helped with security.

The bar owner grinned, jumping onto the table. "We've got a winner! What's your name son?"

"Squad 104." Eren panted breathlessly. "We won. That's our squad name."

The man nodded, handing him the trophy. "Squad 104!"

The bar errupted into cheers.

"Fuck you!" Eren screamed over the noise, proudly flipping off the man who'd insulted his squad with one hand while he held the trophy in the other.

The man ducked out of the bar with several agitated Eren fans on his tail, about to beat the shit out of him.

Eren laughed, before gingerly sliding off the bar back onto the floor, recieving many backslaps from his teammates and even strangers wanting his autograph.

Before he could be devoured by the crowd, though, Levi stepped forward, shoving Eren's leather coat into his hands and giving him a look.

Eren blushed, pulling the coat on over his bare chest- his shirt was nowhere to be found, and he handed Levi his trophy. "I did it, captain." he managed hoarsely. Levi nodded. "Not bad." he admitted.

Eren's squadmates simply stared- Armin with a triumphant smile, givng his friend a thumbs up, Mikasa with her arms crossed but an amused smile on her face, the girl staring t Eren hungrily, and Jean, as well as Connie and some others were staring at Eren in shock.

"Why the hell didn't you tell us you could do that, man?" Connie asked, looking amazed.

Eren blushed. "Never really thought of it, I guess." he admitted sheepishly, trying to hide the way he was blushing.

The crowd was still rowdy for more- people had heard the commotion and come in off the streets, and Levi took it as his signal to get his squad back to the inn they'd be staying at.

"Squad 104- move out."

Levi looked behind him to notice Eren limping.

"Jager- what's wrong with you?" he demanded, tone sounding annoyed. In reality he was slightly concerned. The crowd was still tring to surround them, and having an injured Jeager being kidnapped by a mob of drunks wasn't exactly ideal.

Eren winced, looking up at his Captain hesitantly. "I...I might've jammed my ankle when I landed on the table..."

"Tch." Levi scoffed, lifting Eren like he weighed nothing at all. "Idiot." he muttered, before stepping out into the night, carrying the exhausted titan-shifter back to the inn. Levi wouldn't say it out loud- but he was pretty damn proud of the boy. The youngest member of his squad seemed to have the most heart.

 **Well? Love it, hate it, too OOC? Please review!**


	3. Erwin is Sexually Confused

**Eeeek! I got a few reviews! I absolutely love, love, love any feedback you guys give mee, so please keep it coming! :)**

They were all a little tired and hungover as they rode out, heading back to headquarters. Eld was probably the worst out of all of them- the man had had far too much last night, and he looked like death warmed over. Levi made sure to keep the worst looking members close to him so he could keep an eye on them, and Eren's horse lagged about five meters behind his.

Connie tried to inconspicuously bring his horse a little closer to Eren's until they were riding side by side, trying to keep his voice low.

"C-can you teach me how to do that? I think Sasha would... enjoy watching me do that."

Eren simply looked over at Connie, brows furrowed in confusion. "Y-you want me to teach you how to ride a horse?"

Levi nearly blanched. How could someone who could move like Jaeger be so damn innocent? The boy's dancing screamed sexy, yet he was clueless. Levi fought the urge to facepalm- that'd let the boys know he could hear their conversation.

Connie blanched. "No, dang it, Eren! I want you to teach me how to dance!"

I was Eren's turn to look surprised, and he rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. "Uh- sure. Tomorrow night, after training."

Connie grinned. "Thanks."

"No problem."

Connie allowed his horse to fall back into formation.

Eren said nothing the whole ride. Normally the boy would be looking for woodchucks along the path, whistling and grinning when they stood on their hind legs as they passed by. But today he simply stared at the road ahead, green eyes serious as he was in deep thought.

When Levi left his horse to be stabled, he stopped to get some important papers that needed doing from his saddle bags, only to grasp something metal. He stared at the trophy in his hand, grinning slightly, before sliding it into his coat, where it'd be hidden from sight, and heading into the castle, papers in arm.

* * *

He was buried in paperwork. Why was it anytime the damn government ws involved, he had a metric fuckton of papers to fill out? Normally paperwork was relaxing, but not this much! All this for simply one mission? It was ridiculous!

Commander Erwin strode into the room, smiling slightly about something. The man didn't notice the trophy sitting quietly in a corner on Levi's desk- if he had, he would've seen it'd been polished so there were no fingerprints.

"Levi,"

"Yes?" Levi looked up at the man he'd come to think of as a father, stressed but trying not to let it show.

"Eren's down in the courtyard leading some type of drill. Extra practice, maybe. I just thought you should know- I know you think he's immature, but he's a good soldier sometimes."

Levi nodded, not really giving what the man was saying any thought. He just wanted to get back to his damn paperwork.

"I've been called to the Capital- expect me back in time for training at six." Erwin said simply.

Levi looked up, surprised. "We were just at the Capital this morning. What could possibly have come up..."

"I'll find out, I suppose. Hold down the fort."

"Yes sir." Levi nodded to the blonde man who gave him a small smile before heading out.

* * *

Levi was leading the squads through formation. They were looking surprisingly good- maybe they'd been praticing or something. Either way, he was impressed.

Until Erwin strode into the courtyard, looking incredibly disturbed. "Captain Levi. I need to speak with you."

Levi nodded, recognizing the seriousness in the man's tone. "Eld. Take over." he ordered, before falling into step beside his commander. They walked a healthy distance away before Erwin spoke.

"I was called to the Capital. They informed me that parts of the city rioted last night, a bunch of drunks- something about a titan shifting dancer. Care to answer?"

Levi looked confused for a moment, before he nearly burst out laughing. Erwin's eyes darkened at his reaction, and LEvi sighed. "It's been exaggerated, I assure you. Damn delegates, shitting their pants whenever they hear a breath of rumor..."

"Did Eren shift into a titan while in the capital. At all?" Erwin glared at Levi.

"No. Eren was human the whole time- the boy never left my sight."

Erwin looked pensive. "Did he dance at all?"

Levi grinned. "Why don't you ask him that?" he was already turning, heading back towards the assembled squad with Erwin beside him, looking confused.

"Jager!"

"Sir!" Eren barked from where he stood, saluting.

"At ease. Jager- the Commander wants to see what you did at that pub last night."

Eren's eyes widened. "Sir?"

"Eren- I want to know exactly what happened at that bar. Can you show me?" Commander erwin stepped forward, looking serious. Hopefully he could get a straight answer out of the titan shifter. Eren nodded, a determined look crossing his features.

"Of course, Sir. Armin?" Eren turned to look at his blonde friend. "I'm gonna need some music and a fedora."

"Sure thing, Eren!" Armin raced off towards the barracks at a full sprint.

Eren was dressed in his typical attire- his brown combat boots and brown slacks, as well as his green shirt and ODM harnass. As Armin went off to get the items he'd requested, Eren turned to the side slightly, fingers starting to undue the buckles of His harass almost sensually. The boy had a hard time undoing one, and he took the lether strap in his teeth so he could use both hands to undo it deftly, before moving onto the next.

Erwin stared. "JAger, what the hell are you doing?"

Eren had another strap of leather in his mouth, and he flicked his gaze over, but he was otherwise occupied, so he couldn't answer.

"You can't expect him to dance with a harnass on!" Connie protested, and Eren nodded his agreement as he undid the last buckle, stepping out of his harnass all together.

Before Erwin could even begin protesting, Armin was back, tossing Eren his fedora and beging to set up the record player from the mess hall.

Eren grinned, taking his place leaning sloppily against the castle's stone wall. A moment later, poker face started blaring.

Eren finished the same routine from the night before in a full split, tossing a handfull of glitter into the air. His shirt was off- he'd taken it off mid-dance and thrown it to his cheering squadmates, and though Levi had never seen his hands move down there, the first button of his pants was undone yet again...

Eren panted happily, eyes full of passion.

"That's what I did at the bar last night." he announced proudly, before he frowned, looking thoughtful. "Well- actually, i didn't have any glitter at the bar, but I put some in my pocket today, since it's good to have, and it really sells the whole routine- don't you think?"

Erwin stared, looking disturbed. He wasn't sure whether he should be impressed or ashamed the boy's dacne had capitivated him.

Levi pursed his lips, realizing Erwin was too shocked to say anything.

"Not bad, Eren. I do like the glitter- it adds a nice touch." it was Levi who spoke, and Eren's face absolutely lit up. "I thought so too!" he hadnt even bothered to get up from his split, and Levi was both impressed and cringing internally- he'd never been flexible enough to do that.

"That's enough for today, Jaeger. Hit the showers."

"Yes Sir!" Eren grinned, saluting, before turning and sashaying once before he was out of sight around the corner.

Erwin still hadn't said anything.

"I thought he was pretty damn good, myself." Connie spoke up. "In fact, he was even nice enough to teach us some moves earlier today."

"That's what he was doing in the courtyard!?" Erwin looked mortified.

Connie nodded. "Um- yeah..."

Erwin turned and walked away, and Levi couldn;t help but feel slightly concerned about what his commanding officer and father-figure was thinking right about now. "Everyoe- hti the showers."

"But Sir- we have dance class with Eren at eight." Sasha piped up.

Levi stopped for a moment, thoughful, before he nodded.

"Alright then. Just stay out of trouble." and he was gone, striding briskly after Erwin.

It was two hours later, as dance class was going on in the courtyard and the faint sounds of Katy Perry could be heard when Levi strode into Erwin's office to fidn the distressed looking man standing at his window, hands clasped behind his back, watching the goings on.

"Don't give me that shit! C'mon- this move is all about the ass!" Eren shouted over the music. The boy had lined everyone up against the wall, as Christa had wanted to learn how to twerk first. Eren surveyed them all like cattle he was triyng to buy, looking stern for some, and happier with others.

"Get it moving, Jean!" Eren snapped.

"Not everyone has a fat ass, Jaeger!" Jean snapped, frustrated.

"No- but you _are_ an ass, Jean, so you should have no problem with this!"

Everyone giggled slightly at Eren's witty retort, and Erwin looked at though his soul had been ripped out as he watched from his office window.

Levi sighed. "Are you gonna just stand there looking like a kicked puppy, or are you gonna tell me what's wrong?"

Erwin looked distraught. "Nothing in my military training has ever prepared me for this. I'm not sure I should let it go on."

Levi scoffed. "What, the dancing? I don;t see the harm in it. It keeps the morale up- god knows they need a little fun-"

"You dont get it, Levi!" Erwin thundered, whirling, face full of emotion. Levi backed off for a moment, surprised.

"Alright- what don't i get?"

Erwin loked pained, like he could hardly say it. "While Jager was dancing... I...it turned me on. He's a male, Levi, and he's also only fifteen- so that makes me a _gay pedophile."_

Levi scoffed. "Are you fucking kidding me? That's what you've been up here sulking about?"

"I'm being serious, Levi! He turned me on, and it was WRONG..."

"You're not gay and you're not a pedophile, godammit. You just like to see a nice ass. You think you're the only one who got turned on watching him dance? Hell, the whole damn squad was turned on..."

Erwin looked shocked. "So- I'm not gay?"

Levi threw his hands up in the air, exhasperated. "How the hell should I know!? I don't know if you're gay, Erwin, and I don't really care!"

"So- this means I'm not a pedophile, either?"

Levi facepalmed. "No, Erwin. You just like to watch Eren flaunt it- and i can't blame you for it."

Erwin looked at though a great weight had been taken from his shoulders. "Thank god. Then I guess it's alright they're dancing, if they really enjoy it. Besides- it gives Jeager a bit of leader experience, teaching them how to dance..."

Erwin strode back to the window.

"We'll now move onto step two- grinding! The key here is to rub your ass in a _delicate_ way- it doesn't have to be raunchy." he flashed a grin. "Unless you like it that way- in which case- go for it. Armin- care to help me demonstrate?"

Armin hurried over, grinning.

"Let's just keep this out of the mission reports, though. Just to be safe. Having a teenage titan shifter unnerves the capital enough- having a dancing teenage titan shifter might just push them over the edge." Erwin said.

"Agreed."

 **Response to Flying Gayness on Chapter 2;**

Flying Gayness; Wow- I mean really that was amazing! I can't really say how it made me feel, but damn is it entertaining! I hope you plan on continuing, if so I look forward to reading!

 **Thank you! I'm glad you enjoy it! I wanted it to be sort of out there and absurd but not too OOC- the show is so serious all the time, I wanted people to have a humorous story to read about it. Plus- you can read it any pairing you want. Levi/Eren, Armin/Eren, Levi-/Erwin- anything is possible if you want it to be! I'm really glad you're enjoying it! :)**

 **Please review! Love it or hate it- I wanna know! ;)**


	4. They start a City-Wide Orgy

**Alright. I've had this planned out for a while, but I was unsure how to execute it, so it took a bit to write. basically, Eren's talent comes in handy when the squad starts a major celebration after a mission is successful and the entire city gets in on it, and, well, yeah. Features drunk Eren and bro-Armin! THIS IS NOT THE LAST CHAPTER! PLEASE REVIEW IF YOU ENJOY IT! :)**

Every mission seemed to be a blood-bath- every soldier seemed to have numbered days. They were always carrying back bodies, always handing remains over to distraught families- but once- just this once, they hadn't lost a single man.

The crowd murmured quietly among themselves, surprised to see only a few bandaged soldiers and no wagons heaping with the dead.

Levi and Erwin brought up the rear of the procession- it was an odd feeling, as for once, they weren't working damage control and delivering remains to distraught relatives. It was a foreign yet pleasing feeling, to know no one had been lost- still, it was disheartening to know they'd probably never experience something this successful again. Bringing everyone back alive once was a one in a million chance in itself...

The procession came to a stop, and Levi exchanged glances with Erwin, confused. they hadn't ordered a stop.

There was yelling in the distance, then, before the crowd absolutely exploded into cheering.

 **Five minutes earlier, at the front of the procession...**

"What if the crowd doesn't respond like we anticipated, Eren?" Armin looked over at his friend, who was marching in the front row with him, anxiously.

"I'll take the blame if it doesn't work out, Armin..."

"Would the both of you just shut up already? It'll work just fine- what on earth can the crowd be angry about? We didn't lose a single man. Now quit making contingencies and get ready for Christ's sake..." Jean looked over at his comrades sharply.

Connie jumped down from a wagon about twelve rows back, sprinting to the front of the procession and panting, nodding to Eren. "We're ready!"

"Stop!" Jean pulled the reins of the wagon walking behind them, effectively bringing the entire procession to a grinding halt, before fairly throwing Eren up onto the wagon, where the boy stared at the huge crowd blankly for a moment...

Desperate looking mothers and starry-eyed children all stared at the titan-shifter- he stood taller than any of them, since he was on a wagon, but he had no idea what on earth to say.

He saw Armin's hopeful blue eyes locked on his own. _You can do it, Eren. Tell them what's happened..._

Armin's faith in him was all he needed. His features hardened with determination as he lifted his foot up onto a crate nearby him, standing straight and authoritative as he addressed the crowd.

"People of Wall Sina! We've returned with every soldier we left with. Not a single man was lost!" his voice was so loud and authoritative he hardly recognized it.

Mothers burst into tears of relief, knowing their children in the army were well, and children stared at him with a mixture of admiration and awe.

"Today we've made great strides in not only the completion of our mission, but for the rise of humanity, as well!"

The crowd erupted into cheering, then, a roar so deafening it nearly knocked Eren from his place on the wagon.

"Squad Alpha, gimme a beat!" Eren shouted over the deafening roar.

Underneath the cheers was the first sharp sounds of percussion- the record players they'd rigged up in the wagon all started in perfect unison, throwing out the first few percussive measures as Dillon Francis and DJ snake's "Get Low" was belted into the air.

The 104th squad took point, then, strutting forward in perfect formation, one arm swinging with the other resting on their hips, before they dissolved into the flawless choreography they'd learned from none other than Eren Jager.

 **At the rear of the formation...**

"What the hell is going on!?" Erwin yelled over the deafening cheering, pulling the reins of his horse hard, struggling to keep her from rearing as people flooded the street.

Levi was so stunned at the thought of all these people _touching him_ that for a moment he didn't hear the pumping of the music beneath the cheering. His eyes widened when he did and realized exactly what was happening.

"Eren's started a flash mob!" he shouted over to Erwin, swatting people's filthy hands away from him.

"What the fuck is a flash mob!?" Erwin cried, still jockeying for control over his horse as the crowd lifted him off his trusty stead, before passing the victorious commander over the veritable wave of people in an un-willing crowd surf.

"Levi! What the hell!?" Erwin's voice was gone, then, and Levi stared, praying the older man realized this was a celebration before he hacked some people to death.

"Nobody fucking touch me!" he cried over the noise. "Dance in the streets if you want to, but the next person who touches me dies!"

The procession fell into chaos, then- people screamed as the 104th paraded into the city, victorious, Eren leading the charge, throwing a handful of glitter in the air.

The next seven hours were one of the most intense parties the city had ever known- Eren found himself on a stage somewhere, grinding with Armin while Connie and Jean worked back up, hands on the wall, twerking furiously.

People were dancing in the streets, alcohol was flowing like Niagara falls,and fireworks split the night sky. It was one of the most insane nights Eren had lived through- and that was saying a lot.

* * *

It took Levi seven hours to find Commander Erwin. The older man was looking confused and shocked at the partying in the street, but he sagged in relief when he saw Levi. "Levi! what the hell is going on!? What happened to the Scout Regimen!?"

"They've been split up, sir! I believe our best course of action is to head to the designated hotel and wait for everyone to regroup!" Levi yelled over the whoops.

"What about Eren!?"

"He won't go titan as long as he's dancing!" and with that, Levi grabbed the Commander's hand, leading him back to the hotel where the regimen had been planning to stay in upon their return. Approximately fifty of their soldiers had already congregated there, and they gave them all tipsy smiles, raising glasses of sloshing ale when their commanders approached.

Erwin was completely out of his element and went directly up to his room, while Levi went back to the streets, deciding to try and round up more soldiers if he could, while looking for Eren.

* * *

Eren came to with the taste of tequila in his mouth in a pile of trash, in a dark alley.

He groggily sat up, swallowing back the urge to vomit. "Ugh-"

The fireworks going off in the night sky hurt his head, now, he wasn't wearing a shirt...

"What the fuck happened?"

Someone was on all fours next to him, vomiting loudly, and he looked over, surprised, to see Jean, wearing an askew party hat and puking up a mixture of coke and rum.

"Jean?" he asked groggily.

Jean continued to throw up. Eren realized someone was helping him and made out Armin's face in the darkness, as his friend rubbed Jean's back.

"Armin, is that you?"

"Eren? Oh, thank god- we were dancing, everyone kept buying you drinks, you got so wasted you started to take off your clothes and tried to jump off a balcony, then you started crying and you wouldn't let me take away your bottle of whiskey- I was trying to get you and Jean to the hotel, but Jean came over here to throw up and you passed out..."

"Oh. Tha's innnnteresting..." Eren kicked over a trashcan to his right and began rooting through the garbage, fascinated by the rotten fruit he found. He began to pound it with his hands...

"Eren what the hell!? That's disgusting!" Armin cried, looking horrified but still too busy holding Jean up to intervene.

"Noooo... it's fruit. It's healthy." Eren corrected him, before squishing a particularly soft orange beneath the palm of his hand, looking fascinated as it covered his hands in juice. he started to lick his hands, everything seemed far more interesting when he was drunk...

"For the love of god, Eren!" Armin slapped him, looking incredibly annoyed. Eren looked over at his normally mild-mannered friend, shocked he'd just slapped him, before his alcohol-saturated brain caught up with him and he burst into tears.

"Eren! I'm sorry, okay! Stop crying!" Armin looked alarmed, and Eren wiped his nose on his arm, looking up at his sober friend with large, scared green eyes.

Armin sighed, slinging Jean's arm over his shoulder and helping the drunk man stumble along while leading a rather child-like Eren by the hand.

Everything fascinated Eren, he was like a child when he was drunk.

"Look at the fireworks, Armin!" "Look at the fruit, Armin!" "Look at that naked guy, Armin!" the final comment caused Armin to break into a jog, doing his best to get his inebriated friends out of the area as soon as possible.

Still, by the time they'd reached the hotel where the Scout Regimen was staying, Eren had asked a man to have sex with him, licked a building, and eaten three bugs he'd found on the sidewalk. Jean had been puking every couple of minutes. Armin felt like an incredibly flustered father.

Just outside the hotel, Armin held Jean up while the man puked and Eren was fighting a lamp post.

"Eren, stop it!"

"Fuck you, you stupid piece of shit!" Eren was punching the metal, doing little damage to the post but injuring his hands. Armin finally got checked in, dragging both his friends around their fellow drunk soldiers in the lobby and throwing them both into the room, turning Jean onto his side and placing a trash can nearby him before trying to convince Eren that the blankets would not eat him and that he _did,_ in fact, need to go to bed, because it was three in the fucking morning.

It was a night he'd rather forget- still, it was a little sweet when, right as he dropped off to sleep, Eren slurred "I luff ya, Armin."

Armin allowed himself to smile slightly before crawling into the bed with his friend. there were only two beds in the hotel room, and there was no way he was sleeping with Jean and risking being puked on.

Eren was an absolute idiot when he was drunk, but he was kind of sweet. Yes, the night had been pretty weird and scary with the entire city partying, but it was a sweet moment...

It was exactly at that moment when Jean threw up again, ruining said sweet moment. Armin sighed- he could clean it up later. He finally fell into a well-deserved sleep beside his best friend.

 **PLEASE REVIEW! :)**


	5. AN

**Yes, yes, I know, I'm a piece of shit for not updating. In my defense, though- I'm attending higschool full time while taking nightschool courses at a local community college as well as taking martial arts and watching anime as writing fanfiction any spare moment I get.**

 **Now that that's off my chest- I couldn't decide how to end this fic. So there are two endings. Ending A is for people who like a more direct ending, with more hurt/comfort, concerned Erwin, and more direct interraction. Ending B is for people who want to assume a few things without all the verbal interraction. Regardless, this is it for this fic- so please read them both and tell me what you think! :)**

 **Also- please check out my other fic for this genera- W** **e Do It Differently in Shingashina** **\- about Eren's escapades when he misunderstands orders and such. Thanks again, guys! :)**


	6. Ending A

**Alright- this is the more direct ending here. It can be read as Levi/Eren or bromance, whatever you want it to be. Basically the aftermath and a little bit of Levi/Eren bonding over the stupid shit Eren's gotten into.**

Erwin wordlessly plucked the glass rod from the boy's mouth, reading the mercury carefully and frowning. "He's definitely ill."

"You're sure he's not just hungover like the rest?"a younger squad leader inquired.

"Of course- because having a fever is obviously a sign of a hangover." Levi scoffed, glaring at the young commander, who cowered slightly.

Erwin shot Levi a glance asking him not to kill the newcomer, before nodding in agreement with the Captain. "Definitely ill."

Eren shifted, moaning slightly, pale and in a cold sweat, lips parted slightly. He moved to sit up, only to have Erwin's hand on his chest, forcing him to lay back on the bed.

"Don't try and get up, son."

Eren's head lolled to the side, glassy eyes focusing in on the commander. He made no move to get up, so Erwin quietly let go of the boy.

"We went to check on you and found you like this. You're pretty ill, Eren." Erwin's blue eyes met the green ones with concern.

"Water?" Eren rasped, dull green eyes hopeful.

Erwin nodded, handing the boy the glass. He took it in shaking hands, gingerly sipping it once, twice...

His eyes widened before he scrambled away from Erwin, puking into a bucket that'd been placed at his bedside as a precaution.

Erwin looked even more concerned, and Levi winced, feeling both disgusted and bad for the kid.

Erwin nodded to the young squad leader. "Send for a doctor."

The rookie nodded, fairly sprinting out of the room. Eren was hanging half off the bed, drenched in a cold sweat, brown hair flopping over his face. After he was finished puking he barely had the strength to haul his torso back into the bed.

"Commander. Lord Balfour is here to see you..." a wide-eyed cadet stood in the doorway, looking hung over and miserable.

Erwin nodded, casting a worried glance at Eren before turning to Levi. "I have business to attend to- stay with him- inform me if he gets any worse."

Levi wordlessly nodded, before Erwin ducked out, leaving just Eren and a skeptical but concerned Levi in the room.

Eren didn't know whether he was the luckiest soldier alive or the unluckiest. On one hand, having somehow managed to spike a fever in the night had saved him from being punished with all the other troops who'd been drinking, since his hangover was passed off as symptoms, but on the other hand- he felt like absolute shit.

"So, Eren- any idea how you got this ill?" Levi asked innocently, cocking an eye at the boy from where he was leaning against the wall across the room, arms crossed.

Eren froze like a deer in the headlights, and Levi couldn't help but smile. Yes, he knew the boy wasn't really all that ill- but he didn't deserve to be punished for starting a massive celebration in the city, so he'd opted to cover for the boy- and the fever he'd managed to spike had given him the perfect excuse.

"Does it have something to do with this?" Levi pulled a nearly empty bottle of tequila out from underneath the bed, silently thankful that Erwin hadn't noticed it, or the boy would've been in a world of trouble. Erwin was partial to Eren, yes, but he would've dealt with him severely if Levi hadn't helped cover for him.

Eren looked like he was about to pass out. Levi knew he was hungover as well as sick, he knew- he was so screwed.

Levi grinned slightly at the boy's expression. "Relax. I won't tell Erwin. Besides- I can't prove the bottle belonged to you. Only that it was under your bed. For all I know, Jean could've put it there. The fool was incredibly hungover today, along with the rest of the Survey Corps..."

Eren looked at the man tentatively, unsure whether or not to believe Levi was going to help him.

Levi pulled over a chair, putting his feet up on the headboard of Eren's bed. "So, brat- what did you do last night? Besides start a massive celebration, of course."

Eren was silent for a moment. Was this a trick? Levi looked genuinely interested, and he hadn't ratted him out to Erwin, so he was being serious. Eren allowed a small smile to cross his lips, settling back on the bed and pinching the bridge of his nose.

"I got fucking trashed." he admitted, shooting a glance over at Levi to see his reaction. The man was smiling slightly, almost like he was... proud? Erwin hadn't jumped out from the closet to punish him, either, so this wasn't some sort of sting. So he continued. "I don't remember much, but what I do was amazing. Armin and I were grinding on a stage at some nightclub, Jean and somebody were twerking back up, the whole place was going nuts-"

"People started buying us drinks. I didn't pay for a single one the whole night. Some fat guy tried to kiss me, so I kicked his ass-"

Levi snickered slightly at the mental image, and Eren smiled slightly before continuing. "I couldn't find Armin or Jean, and people were still buying, so I just kept drinking. It's all a blur, really..." he felt a wave of nausea and took a breath, willing his stomach to calm down. A moment later he was fine, opening his eyes and grinning at Levi.

"Next thing I remember is waking up in an alley without a shirt. Jean was puking, Armin was helping him, and I started going through garbage or something, because Armin was yelling at me to quit it..."

Levi looked both disgusted and amused by the fact, and Eren continued. "I remember Armin dragging me back to the hotel. And I got into a fight with a lamp post- oh, I also thought I could fly at some point and tried jumping off a balcony. That's what they tell me, anyways."

Levi was grinning in earnest, then, arms crossed, looking thoroughly amused.

"Well- the city is in shambles today. Half the population hung over, the other half trying to clean up the damage done by the drunks." Levi admitted.

Eren winced. "D-do you think they'll find out it was me? We just wanted to dance, I mean, we never meant to start an orgy or anything..."

"There was an orgy?" Levi cocked an eyebrow, and Eren flushed slightly. "Well- there were a lotta people on the streets having... fun. I didn't join in! I was too wasted to care, anyways. But do you think that they'll find out I sorta... unintentionally... started the party?"

Levi shook his head. "I think you're safe. Half the population was wasted last night, anyways, nobody remembered. Besides- who's going to believe that you managed to start the whole thing?"

Eren nodded, looking slightly reassured.

"Did you party last night, too?" he asked, looking at his superior officer curiously.

Levi shrugged noncommittally. "I may have had a few drinks. Nothing compared to you, though- I pulled exactly what you are now quite a few times as a cadet. I used to get plastered at the castle- Erwin would find me the next morning, pale and vomiting, and he'd assume I was ill. Got me out of a lot of unpleasant things. Worried Erwin, though, he nearly called a doctor sometimes. I was an ass." Levi recounted with a smile, reminiscing.

"Was an ass?" Eren asked, raising his eyebrows. "I'd say you still a-" he stopped short when he caught the steely look Levi was giving him.

"I'd stay silent on that topic, Jager. I didn't ask your opinion."

"Yes Sir." Eren looked slightly cowed by Levi's tone, and Levi frowned. He hadn't wanted to end their conversation entirely- he'd merely wanted to tell the boy not to go any farther. Besides- the boy look miserable when he wasn't talking, and despite how annoying he was, Levi didn't like seeing him look so pale.

"W-what'd you do? When you were young and drunk- like me?" Eren's voice was soft, and Levi nearly didn't catch the words, except he did. He smiled, glad the conversation wasn't over.

"Well, let's see. Erwin had a white horse, but one day it wasn't white- it was pink."

Eren's eyes were as big as dinner plates. "No way..."

"Just because he's my commander doesn't mean I worship him." Levi informed him, before he was fighting a smile. "I knew how to make dye. For a whole week Erwin had to ride that horse. He never did find out..."

Eren was fighting the urge to giggle, and Levi was thinking of his other escapades in the scouting legion.

* * *

Eren laid still on the bed, looking limp and listless. Levi was surprised- he'd never seen the boy so still, and he would've been concerned if he didn't know he was playing possum.

Erwin watched the doctor examine the boy from close by, arms crossed, expression worried. Levi wondered breifly if the man had done the same thing when he'd been hungover and Erwin had thought he'd fallen deathly ill. He felt guilty for a brief moment, before he reminded himself that he'd been a teenager. All teenagers were assholes. Even Jager- humanity's hope- was faking it to get out of trouble for drinking, as well.

The doctor felt Eren's abdomen with gentle yet expert hands- the boy didn't complain- in fact, he looked like he was struggling to stay awake at all.

The doctor grunted after checking the boy's heartbeat and breathing before turning to Erwin. "He should be fine within a few days."

"You're certain? He can't hold anything down- not even water..."

Eren seemed not to be listening, his eyes were closed, breathing deep.

"This isn't like him at all." Erwin sounded more like a concerned father than a superior officer, and the doctor looked perturbed for a moment before deciding something.

"If he can't hold anything down, call me again in the evening."

Erwin nodded, still looking doubtful. Levi felt a pang for a moment, wondering if the man had been this worried when he'd been hung over.

A moment later the doctor was gone, and Erwin turned to Levi. "See if you can get room service to bring something up, will you?"

Levi nodded. "I can take care of him. Just work on getting the rest of the Scouts together..." he could tell it was grating on Erwin to have the entire Legion staying in a hotel for an entire day. "I expect you want to be ready to move out tomorrow morning?"

Erwin nodded, still looking stressed. "Yes. But if Eren's not well enough to travel..."

"I can always stay with him for an extra day if needed."

"You shouldn't have to-"

"But I will. I'm responsible for the brat, afterall."

Erwin sighed, before realizing he couldn't argue with Levi. He nodded something akin to thanks toward Levi, before he was striding out of the room, still looking preoccupied.

Levi waited until the sound of the Commander's footsteps faded before turning to look over at Eren. The damn kid had one eye open, looking to make sure the coast was clear, and Levi sighed.

"Alright- I'm going to get you some soup, and you're going to eat it and not puke it back up, because I am not staying here an extra day because you're fucking hung over. Got it?"

"Yes Sir." Eren said, but he had that stupid grin on his face.

Eren, hungover as he was, was nearly asleep by the time Levi got back with a thin bowl of broth the cooks had prepared. He was, to say the least, not amused to find Eren almost sleeping.

"Oi! Brat, wake up! What, do you expect me to feed you or some shit?"

Eren quickly sat up, taking the warm bowl from Levi and moving to drink it.

He sipped at it slowly, and Levi wordlessly pulled out a chair and sat down to watch him and make sure he didn't vomit again.

When Eren was halfway done with the bowl he grimaced slightly, taking a deep breath before his stomach calmed again.

Levi watched him idly, hoping he wouldn't throw up again. He was lost in his own thoughts, so it shook him from his reverie when he turned and realized Eren was speaking to him.

"Captain Levi?"

"Yes?" Levi cocked an eyebrow at him.

"Could you, uh, maybe... take me out drinking sometime? Back at the castle?" Ere wasn't meeting his eyes, and Levi felt both honored and a bit back a laugh. The kid was asking him to take him out drinking while he had the worst hangover of his life. That proved what he'd known all along. Jager was insane.

But the boy was looking at him with those hopeful green eyes, and somehow, he couldn't find it in himself to say no.

"... Maybe. If you're not a pain in the ass on the ride back tomorrow, and if you hold that broth down."

Eren grinned. "Yes sir."

The Captain was going to teach hm how to drink. And, depending on how much they drank- Eren might be able to teach him a few dance moves.

 **Well? Love it, hate it? Regardless, please review! :)**


	7. Ending B

**Ending B here- with a lot less verbal interactions and more of levi's point of view, as well as a little bit of Levi/Eren bickering. Can be read as slash or bromace, whatever you folks want. ;) Please review! :)**

Erwin wordlessly plucked the glass rod from between Eren's lips, reading the Mercury and sighing. There was no doubt about it- the boy was ill.

Levi simply looked at the boy from where he leaned against the wall across the room, skeptical that the boy's illness was caused by fever alone. He had a base feeling Eren had been out drinking last night- but with half the Survey Corps hung over and erwin on his last string, the Commander didn't need to know that.

Levi was actually a little proud of Eren- the boy had single-handedly turned the entire city on its ass with massive celebration, all because he could dance. He was the only one Levi knew with that capability.

"Levi- stay with him. Send for me if he gets any worse." Erwin ordered, brown eyes serious. Levi wordlessly nodded, before the Commander was ducking out of the hotel room, off to attempt to bring order to his hung-over troops.

No less than a moment later was Eren leaning over the bed, dry-heaving into a bucket that'd been placed beside his bed for use such a purpose. Levi winced slightly at the sounds of the boy retching- all that came up was a few mouthfuls of bile and some saliva, before Eren was simply shuddering, wiping his mouth on his sleeve and laying back on his bed, fumbling in an attempt to cocoon himself in the white sheets and failing miserably, ending up being tangled hopelessly in them.

Levi rolled his eyes, crossing the room in three long strides and attempting to free the teenager from his linen prison. Eren blinked sluggishly up at him, surprised, before Levi had wrapped him in the sheets and he was in a little cocoon on the bed, dull green eyes thanking his Captain without words.

"Any idea how you fell ill, Eren?" Levi asked, cocking an eyebrow.

Eren looked startled for a moment before accepting his fate, nodding miserably. "I partied too hard." he admitted, voice barely above a whisper. He closed his eyes, waiting for Levi to explode at him, biting his bottom lip to keep from crying from the impending tidal wave of yelling that never came.

He opened one eye, surprised, to see Levi pull up a chair and sit beside is bed, studying the boy carefully. Messy brown hair in his face, he was actually kind of adorable...

Levi folded his hands as though he were praying, studying the specimen before him, expression never faltering.

"Did you do your best, Eren?"

Eren gave him a blank look- Levi realized the alcohol must've made him twice as stupid, and he thought carefully before he tried again.

"Did you do your best, Eren? When you were dancing?"

Eren nodded eagerly, eyes suddenly alight. "Yes sir- I did all I possibly could to keep the party going." he assured his commander, grinning.

The corner of Levi's mouth twitched slightly as he bit back a smile at the boy's response.

"I suppose that's all we can ask for, then, isn't it?"

Eren nodded, eyes closed, face serene, coming to terms with the fact he'd done all he could do to keep the party alive.

"Rest- we're heading for the castle tomorrow, regardless of how hungover you are." Levi said, standing.

Eren wriggled from within his cocoon of sheets, those glassy green eyes imploring Levi as his lips turned into a frown. "Y-you aren't going to tell Commander Erwin, are you?"

"My position doesn't require I tell him anything, Eren, so long as you're fit for travel by tomorrow." Levi said, hands clasped behind his back.

Eren grinned, relieved, before settling back into his cocoon of sheets, wriggling into a slightly more comfortable position and making some adorable noises Levi pretended not to hear as he settled into the comfort.

"Do you have anything else to say for yourself, Jager?" Levi tossed the question over his shoulder as he headed for the hall- he was going to order some sort of broth for Eren- god knew the boy needed something in his stomach after all the alcohol the night before.

Still, Levi couldn't help but smile as he heard Eren rasp, "Damn good party." before he'd turned the corner and was in the hallway, looking for a hotel worker to order some food from. That damn teenager was going to be the death of him- but he couldn't help but notice the slight smirk on his face as he brought the boy a bowl of broth but couldn't find it in himself to wake the boy from his sleep.

Yes, it was more than likely that the boy would be the death of him. But he didn't really mind.

 **Well? Please review and thanks fr sticking with me, guys! Also- please check out my other stories! :)**


	8. LevixEren Ending

**Alright kids, this is the ErenxLevi ending some of you have been looking for.**

 **I thought I was done with this fic, but nope, this gem came to me.**

 **THERE IS SMUT, SEX, SWEAT AND A HELL OF A LOT OF OTHER STUFF.**

 **IF YOU DON'T SHIP REIREN, ERERI, ERENXLEVI, LEVIXEREN, then DON'T READ IT AND CONSIDER THE LAST CHAPTER THE ENDING.**

 **Finally, this is my first time writing a sex scene, loet alone a gay sex scene, so please be nice with constructive criticism. Please comment your thoughts and be kind!**

 **IF YOU DON'T SHIP ERENXLEVI, THEN DON'T READ THIS AND ASSUME THE LAST CHAPTER IS THE ENDING!**

* * *

Laughter floated up from the training yard, bubbling through above the pumping of music and drifting into the upper windows of the castle. Levi wordlessly learned against the wall and listened, a small smile gracing his lips.

Ever since the Scouting Legion had accidentally started a massive orgy in the capital , the weekly dances on Friday had become a regular thing. Granted, they were far more tame than the orgy had been, as Erwin had made midnight the curfew, but it was inevitable that someone got a hold of a couple bottles of alcohol, and the night got a little wild.

Levi watched the brats fumbling around in the torchlight- so young, so inexperienced- but they were damn good dancers. And some part of him that was still young wanted to go downstairs and join in with them, but he knew he couldn't.

As soon as he walked into a room, all conversation stopped. Postures straightened, people stared at him nervously, swallowing- he was the revered Captain, after all, he couldn't expect to be accepted into a teenager's party.

Maybe, if it'd been some years ago, it'd have been different….

Isabel would've dragged him down to the party against his will, though he would've secretly gone anyways to make sure none of the males made any passes on his surrogate sister. Isabel was strong, but she was young and naive, and he didn't trust anyone but Farlan with her.

Isabel would've laughed, reckless like always, forcing him to dance with her, and Farlan would be hiding his grin behind a glass of alcohol….

Levi frowned. No, those times had long since passed- he wasn't a teenager anymore. And Isabel and Farlan- they weren't _anything_ , anymore….

Levi wordlessly turned, footsteps echoing down the darkened hallway, feeling empty. He didn't want to watch the merriment anymore, didn't want to be reminded of his wasted youth, of his dead friends. Besides- there was paperwork that needed doing.

He opened the door to his darkened office, pulling the book of matches from his pocket and striking one, about to put it to the wick of a candle. He paused, catching sight of someone in the small flicker of flame. Jager.

Eren was shirtless, his surprisingly toned abs looking forbidden, as the leather straps of his harness criss-crossed the muscular flesh. He was in his usual white slacks, but the zipper was undone, and there was a fear beneath the determined look in his eye as he leaned against the back wall of Levi's office, arms crossed over his chest.

There was a… rose? There was a rose and a bottle of wine on the Levi's desk.  
Levi didn't realize it, but he'd been staring long enough that the match in his fingers had burned down to his fingers. He dropped it, surprised, and it went out, leaving them both in darkness again.

Levi composed himself in a split second, striking another match and lighting the candle, staring at Jager indifferently. "Jager. Where the hell is your shirt?"

Eren's expression went from dead-determined to shocked for a moment. "I… um… it's in the wash, Sir." he stuttered lamely. Levi resisted the urge to smirk slightly. In one instant, he'd managed to remove all the sexual tension in the room. Now all he needed to do was shoo Jager out, and he could just forget the entire thing had happened….

"Jager. Shouldn't you be downstairs with your idiot friends?" Levi asked, pretending he didn't notice the candlelight dancing off the boy's skin.

"I had different plans in mind, Captain." Jager's expression was serious yet again, his eyes hungry, though they landed on Levi's face.

Levi raised an eyebrow. The boy had gotten his feet back under him- he wasn't giving up. Impressive- he'd expected him to scurry out of here with his tail between his legs.

"If I didn't know any better, I'd say you were propositioning me." Levi said, eyes flickering over from the rose and wine on the desk back to Jager's body.

"I am, Sir." Eren said calmly.

Levi chuckled- it was a dark, humorous chuckle, and he stepped forward, plucking the rose off the desk and holding it between two fingers.

"You mean to tell me that you, a fifteen year old _brat_ , are propositioning _me_ \- an _officer,_ and a man _years_ older than you?"

Levi closed the distance between them in two steps, dropping the rose to the ground, forgotten. Jager was the only thing he was focusing on, resting his forearm against the wall and staring Jager down. "I could have you thrown out of the corps for this."

Jager's eyes, which had been dulling with fear, flashed with something- anger- for a moment.

"If you don't want to have sex with me, then _throw me out._ But don't play your stupid games with me." he hissed.

Levi stepped backwards, surprised by the reaction on the boy's face, before he chuckled. This chuckle was different than the first, though, it was a laugh of amusement, not meant to inspire fear, and Levi's eyes danced for a moment.

"My my, you have balls, don't you, Jager?"

Jager allowed his mouth to twitch into that stupid smile he had, eyes twinkling. "Would you like to see them, Sir?"

Levi scoffed- damn, this cocky kid.

"Jager. You're fifteen. You don't know what you want…."

"I want you to fuck me." there was no hesitation in Eren's voice, only certainty in his voice. "Would you do that for me, Levi?"

Levi turned, looking away. Something within him had jolted slightly, when Eren said his name….

"You don't know what you're asking, Eren."

"I _do._ "

Damn, this kid just didn't give, up, did he? Levi could feel the heat coiling in the pit of his stomach, and he knew he wouldn't be able to keep denying the boy much longer. Still, he at least had to warn Jager….

"I am older than you, Eren- it will be rough. I can't be held responsible for what I might do to you, in the heat of the moment…."

"Do whatever you'd like, Sir. As long as I can touch your ass, I don't care…."

Levi looked over his shoulder to see Eren staring shamelessly at his ass, and he couldn't help but laugh. "You really are a horny bastard, aren't you, Jager?"

Eren nodded, eyes still fixated on Levi's ass. Levi could see the bulge in the boy's pants, the way he was biting his lip….

"Please, Levi…."

That was all it took. The dam had broken, and Levi turned, pinning Jager against the wall. Their lips crashed together in a flash of warmth- Levi didn't hesitate to slide his tongue into the younger boy's mouth, and Eren moaned, shamelessly grinding his erection against Levi's thigh, making everything seem even hotter.

Levi pulled back for breath all too soon, seeing the crestfallen expression in Jager's green eyes, like a kick puppy.

Levi's hands were on the boy's hips, now, and Eren nosed forward, planting his lips on Levi's pulling the man back in. Their saliva mixed into a delicious cocktail- Levi tasted like salt and leather, while Eren's own earthy flavor surprised but delighted Levi.

Levi's hands were roving his chest as their tongues dueled, feeling every muscle, every inch of flesh- he was going to make this boy his. Eren wordlessly grabbed Levi's ass, struggling to keep pace with Levi's tongue. He tried- as he always did, refusing to give up, but Levi won, and he was drawing back for breath first, whimpering, nearly melting into the wall, a puddle of sweat and sexual heat.

He caught his breath, leaning forward, eager to try again to out-kiss Levi, only to be stopped by Levi's hand.

"No."

Eren whimpered like a child, green eyes pathetic, only to yip in surprise when Levi nipped his neck.

Levi pulled back, grey eyes surveying Eren with alarm. Had he hurt the boy badly?

Eren shook his head, forehead plastered with his sweaty bangs, green eyes glassy. "P-please…." he whispered hoarsely.

The confirmation was all Levi needed, taking the boy to the ground, laying him on the floor gently, crawling ontop of him.

Hands on either side of Eren's shoulders, he went down, working his way across Eren's jaw with alternating kisses and nips. Eren's eyes were closed, now, but he bucked his hips eagerly as the ministrations continued, grinding his erection onto Levi and serving to make the man want more.

Levi wordlessly wandered lower, his lips finding the boy's nipple. Eren's eyes shot open, alternating between whimpering and panting and begging for more as Levi worried the pink piece of flesh between his teeth, tugging it. It was his, now, every inch of this boy was going to belong to him….

Levi finally left the nipple alone, satisfied it'd been thoroughly claimed, wet, warm lips working down Jager's torso and onto his lower belly. He could feel every breath Jager took beneath him, every heartbeat….

His tongue rolled around the boy's navel, and Eren gasped.

Levi slowly worked his hand downward as he continued his ministrations, hands finding Jager's dick hard beneath his touch. He gave the boy a squeeze, surprised and elated that he could make the boy hard like this….

Still, Jager was practically melting beneath his touch, the boy was young, and some responsible part of him wanted to make sure….

"Jager…." he panted out huskily. "Last chance…."

"Fuck me." Eren's whisper made Levi's hot inside's jolt- he'd been praying the boy would say yes, because he just might cry if Eren actually said no and left him in this damn office alone, all wound up….

Levi was working, then, body grinding overtop of Jager as he moved to take off the boy's pants, teeth grazing skin as he used his mouth to pull off the harness.

Eren whimpered, clumsy hands fumbling to pull of Levi's shirt, and Levi let him. As soon as Levi was shirtless, however, Jager went back to grabbing his ass, making no move to take off Levi's pants.

Levi scoffed. "What, that's it?" he held himself above the boy with one hand, undoing his pants with the other and sliding them off, and they were both bare ass naked, the chilly air a shock against their flushed, sweaty flesh.

"W-wait…." Eren panted. "I… I was gonna do a dance… before… to turn you on."

Levi couldn't help but smile, amused, as he looked down at the boy. "go ahead." he managed, pleased that Jager had had the forethought to want to please Levi, as well….

Eren blushed, looking sad. "I… I forgot it…." he admitted.

Levi laughed. "You little shit…."

"I'll do it later! fuck me!" Eren demanded.

"I'm working on it!" Levi spat on his hands, sliding one warm finger into Eren's ass.

Eren winced, his opening puckering around Levi, tensive for a moment before relaxing, and Levi slid in another finger, watching every emotion cross the boy's face. From pained determination and squirming to relaxed, trusting, the boy never once opened his eyes.

Once Levi had slid three fingers in, he started to massage, wordlessly prepping the boy's opening.  
Eren squirmed, eyes opening, and he looked up at Levi pitifully.

"W-what are you doing? I thought you were going to fuck me?" he looked betrayed.

"You really are a virgin, aren't you?" Levi growled, struggling to hold himself back. He wanted it now, Jager wanted it now, but the boy didn't know what'd happen if he didn't prep him enough, and Levi managed to hold himself back with his last strands of restraint.

"Just fuck me!"

"I'm not destroying your ass the very first time! This is your first time, dammit, and I'm going to make it pleasant!" Levi growled.

Eren whimpered, eyes falling shut.

"Shh… soon, I promise." Levi soothed. The boy was nearly ready, the warm walls were barely resisting his fingers, they'd gotten used to Levi's touch….

Levi wordlessly positioned his member in front of the opening, withdrawing his hands, before sliding the very tip in….

Eren resisted for a brief moment, his face betraying him with a brief wince, before he relaxed, staring at Levi with nothing but trust. "More… please."

Levi obliged, and soon his entire member was inside the boy. Levi was throbbing with pleasure, he wanted to continue, but he knew better than to go too fast. Instead he waited, feeling Eren's walls relax around him- he wanted to make _sure_ Eren was ready- he wanted to be gentle with the boy, it was his first time, afterall….

Levi started slowly, with a small thrust, before he went in again, still slowly….

Eren's hazy green eyes opened, he stared at Levi as the man went down on him. "M-more… please, harder… faster…." he panted.

"Start- slow. I don't want to hurt you…." Levi replied, eyes pained. But by the fifth thrust, Eren was bucking his hips eagerly in time with Levi's thrusts, begging for more, and Levi gave in, gritting his teeth and thrusting, his hips meeting Eren's as he plunged deeper, farther than he'd ever gone…. Eren was so warm around him, so welcoming, the boy had such trust in his eyes… everyone else was so afraid of him, the feared Captain Levi- but not this boy. Eren was different….

 _"Levi!"_ Eren was screaming his name, his length was absolutely throbbing against Levi's stomach as Levi hit his prostate, the boy's back arched and his eyes rolled back in his head, screaming Levi's name as his seed spilled onto Levi's stomach.

It was so hot, and Levi had almost reached his max, now, but he grit his teeth and willed himself to hold back, wanting the experience to last longer. Eren was panting beneath him, a sweaty heaping mess beneath his touch, and he finally let go, his seed painting the boy's insides.

He collapsed onto Eren's chest for a moment, a slave to his own pleasure. Eren was gasping as warm seed spilled into him, and they laid there for a moment, limbs entangled, before Levi gently pulled out and rolled off the boy, onto the cold floor beside him, staring at the ceiling, gasping. It'd been so long since he'd felt pleasure like that….

Eren was staring at him, green eyes wide as he caught his breath, and Levi realized he was staring at the large patch on cum from when he'd lost control on him.

"Eren." he knew the boy was self-conscious, it'd been his first time, after all, and he wanted to re-affirm to Eren he'd enjoyed it and be certain the boy remembered this as a pleasant time. Eren spared a glance at him to see the look of love in Levi's eyes and let an exhausted grin cross his face before he was back to being a melted heap of pleasure on the ground, absolutely spent.

Levi wordlessly grabbed a discarded piece of clothing to clean himself up, looking over to see Eren was barely awake and smiling slightly, glad he could give his brat that much pleasure that he was nearly in a coma.

He cleaned the boy up, even the bit of his seed that was still dripping from the boy's ass, before he pulled his pants back on. He wrapped Eren in a spare green cloak he'd had lying around, carrying him bridal-style into his room, thankful the hallways were all deserted at this hour and that his private quarters were nearby. He wordlessly laid Eren down, pulling the cloak off the boy and wrapping him in the sheets before discarding his pants and climbing into bed beside him.

Eren was asleep, now, absolutely exhausted by the adrenalin the pleasure had given him, sleeping on his side. Levi wordlessly put his arms around the boy, before he was asleep, as well. For the first time in a long time, his dreams were pleasant.

* * *

Eren woke up to an amused-looking Levi smiling at him.

"L-Levi?" he asked blearily, trying to prop himself up on his elbow, cheeks flushing when he remembered last night.

"Did you enjoy it, brat?" Levi asked, looking up at him inquisitively.

Memories flashed through Eren's mind- Levi's husky voice, his warm flesh pressed against his own, convulsing with pleasure….

"Yes."

"Would you like to do it again?"

 _"Yes…."_ Eren's eyes widened like a small child staring at candy, reaching out to Levi expectantly.

Levi laughed, pushing him away. "Not now, brat. You wouldn't be able to handle it so soon after…." Levi wordlessly leaned down, planting a kiss on the boy's forehead.

"And besides- you promised me you'd dance next time."

* * *

 **Please review and tell me your thoughts, as it's my first time writing smut! :)**


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